What wives wish their husbands knew about women ! (part1)

In a research conducted by James Dobson, on young women in the ages of 27-40 years, it was revealed that the leading causes of depression among married women: low self-esteem, fatigue, loneliness, and an absence of romantic love.

The women said that the leading in descending order are: absence of romantic love in marriage; in-law conflict; Low self-esteem; problems with the children; financial difficulties; loneliness, isolation and boredom; sexual problems in marriage; menstrual and physiological problems; fatigue and time pressure; and ageing.

The four most frequently- named causes of depression by women he surveyed were: Low self-esteem; Fatigue and time pressure; Loneliness, isolation and boredom; and absence of romantic love in marriage.

What is low self-esteem?

Low self esteem is getting troubled with feelings of inadequacy. It is sitting alone in a house during the quiet afternoon hours, wondering why the phone doesn’t ring, wondering why you have no ‘real’ friends.   It is longing for someone to talk to soul to soul, but knowing there is no such a person worthy your trust. It is feeling that they wouldn’t like me if they knew the real me. It is becoming terrified when speaking to a group of your peers. It is wondering why other people have so much more talent and ability than you do.

It is feeling ugly and sexually unattractive. It is admitting that you have become a failure as a wife or a mother.  It is disliking everything about yourself and wishing, constantly wishing, you could be someone else.

It is feeling unloved and unlovable and lonely and sad. It is lying in bed after the family is asleep, pondering the vast emptiness inside and longing for unconditional love. It is depression. 

The “disease” or problem of inferiority has reached epidemic proportions among females today. Their traditional responsibilities have become matters of disrespect and ridicule. Raising children and maintaining a home hold very little social status in most areas of the country, and women who are cast into that role often look at themselves with unconcealed disenchantment.

How can a husband help his wife cope with long-standing feelings of low self esteem?  The answer is simply keeping the romantic aspect of their marriage alive. Every man needs this one piece of message: to give romantic love to every dimension of feminine nature. This is the foundation for a woman’s self esteem, her joy in living and her sexual responsibilities.  Unfortunately the pressures of earning a living and coping with the day- to- day responsibilities often destroy this marital relationship. 

The need for romantic love is one of the primary understandings that “wives wish their husbands knew about women”.